For two people who asked for a poem about statistics (from him) and bunnies (from her):
Bunnies and statistics
Dont mixtics.
“Means” aren’t fluffy
“standard deviations” don’t snuggle up to you
and whisper (in Bunny-ese)
“You are my God!”
For someone who wanted a poem on “the infinite nature of the universe"
Space
is terribly big
So big that everything fits
into it!
It’s not like a fridge
or a cupboard
or my fading memory
For Hannah Brassington, the maker of heavenly sandwiches, who asked for a poem about sandwiches.
Sandwiches
are like life
you get out of them
what you put into them.
Sandwiches
are like my heart
if left alone
they curl up and go dry.
For someone who could not make up her mind about what she wanted, but finally asked for a poem about indecisiveness.
Lisa - oh Lisa -
‘’what do I think
about indecisiveness?’’
How can I tell?
What can I say?
How can I persuade
the delphic oracle
to speak
How can I pray
for revelation, for prophecy-
How can you seek
the answers to these questions from me?
For someone who wanted a poem about deserts. I asked her if she wanted anything more, but no, she said, just deserts.
Just deserts-
always get their just desserts.
They have no friends
And are lonely even at weekends.
Weep for them!
Your tears may allow
one desert bloom to flow-
er.
For someone who wanted a poem on the Labour Party’s election defeat.
Their faces were red
Their spirits drooped
while the Tories whooped.
They limped home
with a bitter taste
the rank saliva of defeat
anointing their teeth.
They looked into each others’ faces
And saw the skull beneath.
For someone who wanted a poem to celebrate the life of a much loved dog, now dying of cancer
...To a beloved life partner Archie (the boxer dog)
When you looked into my eyes
I saw such love there
When I took you to the vet
I felt such trust there
While you live,
in my heart,
I have such gain there,
And when at last
we have to part
I will feel such pain there.
Something on Communism.
Marx
had some larks
But Lenin
was more unbendin’.
On exams.
Revising for exams
is part of life’s plan,
but lying in the sun
is far more fun.